Rachel

It's interesting that my marriage that did not happen actually did change the course of my life. By calling off my wedding, I was able to embark on the life path that was actually meant for me, the one that I had sacrificed. And that's what led me to this journey today. I remember drawing my tarot deck when I was in the middle of my RV road trip right after I called off my wedding. I had nothing to lose at this point in my life. When there's nothing to lose, you have everything to gain. When you've lost your entire identity, you've lost every solid structure in your life, and you're figuring out what's next. There was no fear of taking risks.

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I think my biggest fear of becoming an artist was I would be alone. If you think of any artistic endeavor as an artist, it's very solo. You're going inward. You're by yourself, and you're spending hours in your craft. What I didn't want to happen was to just retreat into my home and be hidden again. So, I decided to get a public space, an art studio that I could share and open up with others. And that's what really led to this journey of having a shop, having everything that you see here that I did not anticipate. I did not plan to open up a crystal store. I didn't plan to have a gallery. It was just a byproduct of what I was doing. I love that I get to have my own store and shop because I get to interact with people daily in a way I never used to as a graphic designer. I watch people walk through my door, and they feel a sense of relief, excitement, and happiness. Sometimes they cry when they walk in because their soul feels this feeling of permission. They're watching me live this life of my dreams, and it's showing them that it's possible.

Trust that each step of your journey will unfold in front of you. Trust that the help you need will always arrive. You will always meet the right people, the right circumstances, and the right situations to make sure your gifts are shared with the world. Everything that you need is always going to be provided for you. That's why I'm in so much trust, surrender, and gratitude every single day. I know that everything I need is already here, and if it's not, it's going to show up. The universe has a great sense of humor. I decided in early 2020 to retire from my graphic design profession and devote myself entirely to painting and to being out in the world with people. Two weeks after I sold my online business, I said, 'Okay, I'm finally ready to get away from the computer.' Then the pandemic happened, and we had to shut down for two months. I laughed because the universe is so funny in the timing that I finally took this leap of faith. The timing was not up to me. I had to go home for two months and be alone in my house. It gave me time to rest. It gave me time to paint my spirit animals.

When I was in college, I was commissioned to make paintings for others, and I was not painting the subject matter that I wanted. Because of that experience, I thought that I wasn't a good painter. I didn't think that I was very good at it. Later in life, I realized that the only time I had given myself the opportunity to paint was when somebody else asked me to do it. I heard myself say out loud many times, 'I guess I'm just not a painter,' or 'I'm not very good at this.' And I think a lot of people do this to themselves. People say, 'I'm not an artist,' 'I'm not good at this.' But when we come in as children, everyone's an artist as a child. Everyone's good at what they do as a child. I think maybe around the age of seven, eight, nine, we get into our minds and we start to compare to others and think, 'I'm not good enough,' or maybe a teacher or someone tells you, 'You're not good,' and we start to create stories. I came to a point in life where I decided, okay, enough of this story that I have in my mind. It's not even true. I am a good painter. I also used the power of belief to change this, and I said, 'Okay, if I think I can't do something, I need to say out loud that I can.'

I realized the secret to becoming your best self and the secret to living your purpose and your passion, whatever that may be, is to remove limiting beliefs, to heal the trauma that we have, to let go of the pain, and to feel the fullest expression of our soul, to feel happy, light, free. Helping people remove pain, beliefs, and limitations opens them to pursuing their life's purpose. That's how I did it for myself. There are limitations or lack of confidence from other people, and helping people to heal really helps them to pursue their purpose. That's why healing prayer came through when I was writing my latest book. I wondered, why am I helping people heal? I'm an artist, I know, that's why I came here, so why am I doing healing work with people? Why am I helping people discover limiting beliefs?

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I started reading tarot when I was 14. I never anticipated that I would become a tarot reader one day. Here I am, 40, and I'm reading tarot every single day for people. So it's interesting to go back and understand there's a first step to everything. We don't know how that first step is going to connect later in our lives, but those steps always connect. When it was time to make my tarot deck, I reached the conclusion that I needed to make my own tarot deck because using somebody else's artwork and somebody else's meanings and interpretations didn't feel right. I needed to reach within my own soul and find that meaning. When I'm reading tarot for other people, I love the diversity of the people I get to work with. Sometimes it's their first time having a tarot reading. I tell people tarot is a tool. You can pick up a tarot deck and do great things with it. There's no need to have a fear of tarot or anything else that is discouraged because of religion, rules, or society. I tell them, 'Look, this is not fortune telling. Your future is not fixed. I'm not here to tell you your future. That's in your hands. I'm here to help guide you on your path so you can align yourself to the highest path and make the best choices.'

I thought about the end of my life and said, 'Okay, if I was at the end of my life and I didn't need to make money and I had no responsibility, what would I do?' I wanted to paint animals. I knew that I would be so happy painting animals. I knew there were so many of them that I would never run out. I decided to sit down and start painting spirit animals. Before I painted spirit animals, I needed to switch out of that perfectionist mindset of graphic design, and I decided to paint magical creatures first. I chose magical creatures because no one could tell me what a Bigfoot looks like or what was right. So I decided, okay, let me really let my imagination come through. Let me paint things that I want to paint. It was the first time in my career, in my life, I got to choose a subject. When I was at my lowest point in life, when I didn't know what was next, I reminded myself that my future was so bright that I couldn't see it. The future that I am living right now is so good that it's beyond what I was able to perceive for myself. When I was at my lowest point, I knew there was something better. I just did not know what it was.

When I started writing books, I started with children's books, and I told myself, I'm not going to worry about how it's going to get published or the end result. I'm going to start with drawing the pictures. I started with the pictures and the story, then I found the printer, then the distributor, then I started selling it, and I just let each step unfold. Remove your mind from the complications. I baby stepped my way into this life that I have right now. I invited friends to paint with me. I made it fun. I made it comfortable. I held painting nights where I had others come, and we all got to tap into our creativity together. The only reason my life is so good at this point is because I took the risks that were necessary. I knew what was next. I didn't know how it was going to happen. I didn't have a timeline. I just knew I had to start with the first step, do this, paint, draw, get my certification in theta healing, learn these things that are asking me to grow and go beyond my own identity. One day they would make sense. I'm living that day now where everything makes sense.

When you've lost your entire identity, you've lost every solid structure in your life, and you're figuring out what's next. There was no fear of taking risks because I thought I was not good at drawing people. I decided to go to a coffee shop in Bainbridge Island outside of Seattle and draw people at a coffee shop in public. It's important to push ourselves beyond our comfort zone. I took something challenging and decided to do it in front of people just for fun and just to feel that push for myself. The biggest fear that I had when living my purpose was being alone. But that wasn't true. I have found the love of my life. By not settling in the past for something or someone that I thought was going to be the end for me, I took a risk of being alone to find love. I took a risk of turning down a safety net of a job to become an entrepreneur. I've turned down all of these safety nets, options that were easy but didn't feel right in my soul. I knew there was more, so I pushed myself to the unknown, to the beyond.

It is very interesting, the stories that we tell about ourselves. When I said that I was a designer, the way that I interacted with the world was very different. When I said that I was an artist, that changed everything. When I was a designer, I was being told what to do by clients, and nothing ever seemed to be good enough. There was a perfectionism and a control aspect that was beyond my control. It was really about getting a job done and making sure the client was happy. I could only put so much of myself into that. When I decided to become an artist again, it was me reclaiming my identity. I was a very talented graphic designer, but I stopped calling myself that. People would meet me and ask me, 'Who are you? What do you do?' I would say, 'Hi, I'm Rachel. I'm an artist.' I decided to start painting again and really dive back into my roots as an artist. That changed the course of my entire reality.

I knew my purpose since I was very young. I knew that I came to this planet to spread love, beauty, and kindness. I also knew that I came here to make books, make art, and inspire others through beauty. I remember very clearly walking into a library with my mom, looking at all the books, and knowing that I was going to make books. The world needs a way to make a living. If you sing, if you dance, if you make art, that's the very thing the world needs. More creativity, more expression. The world needs more people who are not playing by the rules. The world needs more people who are living their joy, their purpose, and their passion. When we're living our passion, we're happy. If there's more happiness in the world, there's less fear. There's less competition. Everybody is doing what they came here to do, and there would be so much more happiness and harmony.

The purpose of life is to enjoy it. Really, it is that simple. When you enjoy life, you tap into your gifts of what you are good at and what brings you joy. What brings me joy is very different than what brings other people joy. So I encourage you, start with what is right in front of you. A lot of people come to me and ask what their purpose is when I'm doing tarot readings. I've discovered over time that there's a lot of ambiguity or lack of clarity around people's purpose. If everybody just paused everything in their life, sat down with themselves, and asked, 'What makes me happy?' Because it's really that simple. What makes me happy? And what am I good at? That is the key to discovering your purpose. When it comes to your life purpose, I really want to encourage everybody to simplify it. It doesn't have to be as complicated as you think it is. The purpose of life is to enjoy it. Really, it's that simple. When you enjoy life, you tap into your gifts, what you're good at, and what brings you joy.