Inner Child & Subconscious Work

The earliest recollection, around five years old, wasn't the purpose of what I'm to be doing out in the world, but remembering that I have the capacity to give my attention. I learned that around five, and it brought me into the awareness that my attention is mine. The teacher in school at that time wanted my attention, but she wanted it to be directed to her as an authority. And I saw the distinction between what the heart can do with someone else's attention and what her intellect, her mind, wanted to do with my attention. She wanted to school my attention. I wanted to give my attention. So how do we negotiate that? I observed that at five. And I said, why does she want my, why does she want to control me in a way that her heart is telling her not to? There's this awareness that there are two levels of agreement powers, the mind and the heart, and I chose my heart. From there, another kind of energy came in. The second day after that, I woke up two hours earlier because my heart knows what I'm to be doing differently than what the mind reality knows. It wasn't as clear then, but I tracked it. I'm doing what I'm doing now because of knowing that I could concentrate my attention and come into a different state of consciousness.